5. Gemini

People hate Geminis because they think they’re two-faced liars. Frankly, those people are probably not great at reading people and that’s their own problem. I can appreciate an Oscar-worthy performance and love Geminis as a result. They’re simultaneously the fun-loving life of the party and hyper-intellectual nerds always up for a D&M. What’s not to love? Also, they always have the best gossip. 10/10. 98% on Rotten Tomatoes.

4. Sagittarius

For a great deal of my life, I openly hated Sagittarians and then I realised at least half my friends are Sagittarians. I’ve since decided to change my stance and focus on their strengths. They’re heaps of fun and very warm and loving, much like other fire signs but without the out of control ego of Leo and the thirst for destruction of Aries. I mean they still have those attributes, but it’s just dialled down to a very ‘sane enough to hang out with’ level. Would I date one? Probably not. Friends? Sure why not. 

3. Aquarius

You know-it-all quirky SOBs. I’ve heard Aquarians described as aliens with a human mask on and frankly I couldn’t write a better description if I tried. My mum’s cavi has a lot of Aquarius placements (yes, I looked up his chart. I’m THAT person) and he is by far the cutest and weirdest dog I’ve ever met. He regularly tries to fight towels, is obsessed with eating rogue feathers when out for a walk and his favourite snack is ice cubes. He would kill everyone he loves to crunch some tasty, tasty ice. Anyway, he’s clearly an alien imposter posing as a dog but I love him anyway. “Human” Aquarians = also good.

2. Capricorn

An honourable mention goes to Taurus because I bloody love earth signs with their dry humour and disapproving glares, but I cannot dispute the sheer productive power of Capricorns. They just get it done. It’s inspiring to be around (if not a bit disheartening…I’ll never be as productive *cries in Pisces*) and I think we all need those heroes around to inspire us to turn Netflix off and get to the important stuff…like buying and selling shares…or something? I don’t know. Please see Pisces mention above.

1. Virgo

Virgo men will be the death of me. That is all.

Please note: absence of water signs is very intentional.